pooped out

ok, not "literally", like gross

i mean like tired, only i didn't want to write that cuz pooped just sounds better, ya know? ok, perhaps i'm weird whatev, anyways all this driving for work is tiring me the hell out, and my poor baby luv car that i've had for ever has HAS to be on it's last leg is somehow keeping up with it all (you just watch it will totally break down or something will happen now that i say that). i normally like to drive, i'm always the one that drives if and when we go somewhere together (hardly ever), but DAMN driving All day (well not exactly all day, i'm in and out and going from one stop to the next and driving 1 hr to get there...) is hard on a person, my back hurts, my feet hurt from walkin in heels (i refuse to wear ugly shoes) and it's HOT as hell cuz my air conditioner died like 4 years ago and i'm to cheap to fix it

and i'm still stressing about this freakin job, should i quit, should i stay

back and forth and back and forth

i'm already putting way to much pressure on myself and my anxiety level has to be sky high which is not a good thing for me mentally. i'm half wishing i would've took the summer off, drawn un-employment but no, i took the 1st job i was offered, and i so shouldn't do that the "what if's" but i do. i also wish another job would magically appear, like, now, but sadly there's limited jobs here. i need to quit this cuz i'm driving my self insane and probably making myself sick with worry in the process but you know how if you were addicted to crack and you wanted to quit it, it's something like that. ok. perhaps not that drastic but it's hard for me. i'm a worry wort through and through which has been passed down thru the generations and it's not going to go away over night

that's my rant for the night, i'm going to bed, taking my pooped ass to bed, say thank you