Tuesday, January 11, 2005

Ch..Cha....Changes

I'm not big on BIG changes, my mind cannot seem to cope with change and I don't handle it very well. My office is moving (finally) we've only been in the process of it for 11/2 years (pretty much since I was first hired on as a summer casual position to provide cover off while everyone else was on vacation). I can't belive that come this May I will have been with this department for 2 years and i'm still only a "casual", mind you I work the full time hours and get all the great benefits but i'm still a "casual".

I'm getting off track a little bit here but I need to get this off of my chest, i'm getting extremely irritated/frustrated about the whole "casual" thing. I really like my job on most days, I like all of the people I work with and overall I am happy but my happiness is being threatned or mabye i'm being over paronoid but I just have a gut feeling that my time is running short here. Stupid gov't keeps renewing my contract for another 6 months, now back in October/November my contract ran out yet again and they did renew me much to my surprize, the only stipulation was that they can only keep me as long as the position i'm covering off in stays vacant (i'm giving you the shorter version, as it gets really complicated...) I'm covering off for Debbie and Debbie is covering off for another lady named Susan and if Susan's position gets filled then Susan shifts back down to her regular position and Debbie comes back out front and i'm bummped out of the entire equation. See my stress....

They are in the process now of doing interviews for this postion that has been vacant for 2 years and i'm praying to god, please god do not fill this position or just make everything right and hire Susan to do the job and promote Deb and give me the position I want :). If only things could be this way, it would make my life soooooo much easier and happier.

OK I feel somewhat better getting that off of my chest I have been holding that in for wayyyy to long. Now back to the whole moving thing.......

Were packing, boxing up stuff, throwing old crap out and all that fun stuff but i'm really not having fun and i'm really not looking forward to moving into our new office with our fellow department. I as noted above do not deal well with change. And this new move is going to throw a whole heck of a lot of new "changes" at me in the next few weeks. So i'm dreading the move and i'm even more so dreading next week when we are finally posted at our new office. Sigh~ guess I just gotta deal with it and continue on and keep my chin up but i'm finding it very hard lately, i've been in one of my funky weird moods and I can't seem to snap outt've it. One day I may be ok and then the next I feel like blatting or beating the crap out of something and on top of the weird moods i've been sick to my stomache, headachey, etc, again this comes and goes. I don't know what the hell is up with me but i've gotta come around sometime at least i hope I do.

Not sure if anyone from my family has been here lately or not I feel like such a loser as I have had any comments posted in like FOREVER and I am hoping that were not falling out of touch already :( that would make me very sad. Anyways hope you guys are still out there and check in and leave a post dammit, so that I know what's going on with you too. Take care and i'll be back

~h~

1 comment:

flea said...

wow, andy that was really touching and moving.....thanks :). I check yours and jilly's sites everyday too, i'm such a loser but I just love blogging........